Trifecta – Alley Confusion


Today’s Music: V V Brown – Shark In The Water
Note on Today’s Music: The rest of her album is good, and not near as pop-ie as this. But the chorus got stuck in my head, so hear it is.

This is a response to this weeks Trifecta Challenge. It plays with a theme that keeps rattling around in my head, but I haven’t figured out how to develop it. Yet.

Oh, and to the judges, I used the definition for the challenge almost exactly. hehehe.
Hope y’all enjoy it.

Wait – What?!?

Everything – every piece of fiction, even an inkling of an idea – that’s written creates a world. Bright sunny spaces, dark foreboding places, and everything in between.
I like the ideas best. It leaves us, those that populate these worlds, a lot more leeway to interpret and develop them.
Sometimes, magic can happen.
And sometimes…not.

“Dude, what the hell are you doing?”
I wore my gardening apron that says “Dig It!” in bright letters. I had my toolbelt – mini-spade, a bottle of plant food in water, and a short stake to hold the bloom off the ground until she got settled.
My compatriot was not dressed for gardening.
The boots weren’t flashy. They were tough, well worn. The motorcycle jacket fit like a coat of armor, the leather of his waist holster matching the leather of the twin shoulder holsters he wore.
The twilight reflected off the long knife strapped to his hip.

“Man”, I said, “That metal’s gonna rust while we’re planting in the valley”.
He looked confused. “What valley?”
“Didn’t you read the challenge idea he wrote?” I’m going to plant a Lily.”
His palm smacked his forehead. “Can’t. You. Read?” he asked slowly, through clenched teeth. “This isn’t a fun summer outing. We’re going to be dodging bullets, hiding behind dumpsters in cramped spaces.”
“But we agreed”, I answered. “We both said we should go with Lily for the challenge”. I held up my potted plant. “I took Lily, the word and came up with Lily of the Valley!”, I finished, grinning.

He sighed, squeezed his eyes shut and pinched the bridge of his nose. Then he whipped out his smart phone, tapped the screen and held it up to me.

http://www.trifectawritingchallenge.com/

ALLEY
3: a narrow street through the middle of a block giving access to the rear of lots or buildings

“Nooo”, he said even slower. “We’re rescuing Lily from the ALLEY!”

I looked down at my plant, my apron.
“Dumpsters?”
He nodded.
“Rats too?”
“Yep.”

Oops.

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70 responses to “Trifecta – Alley Confusion

  1. Nice twist! I absolutely love the gardening outfit! HA ha! What a great contrast with the biker. I love the ending too. Nicely Done El Guapo! :D

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  2. Well done, dude. I can just see you sitting naively in your gardening apron when the swarthy one enters the scene. Lily sure is lucky to have a rescuer like you. I just hope you take the apron off before the blood starts to flow. It would be a shame to mess it up.

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    • Please refrain from that kind of language, WG. This is a family blog.
      Swarthy indeed. You may as well have said Jowly and Hirsute while you were at it.

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  3. I love me a good pun!
    Is the “Dig It’ apron in any way autobiographical? My grandma used to have a bumper sticker that read ‘I Dig Flowers.’

    Of VVB’s work, I’ve only heard ‘Shark In The Water.’ I liked it.

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    • Sorry Smak. My gardening experience consists of buying fresh vegetables at the store.
      You should check out some more V V on you tube, and if you like that, look up Imelda May. Great stuff!

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  4. Only you El Guapo, only you..excellent!

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  5. Nice job sir. Good tune to. Hadn’t heard her before.

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  6. Pure brilliance. So clever!!

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  7. When I first read your title I thought of Ball of Confusion by the Temptations so I truly expected to see that as your song choice, but no matter. I really like this piece. It opens very strongly and pulls you in. I love the imagery of every written work being its own world. I also think you did an excellent job of giving us a sense of the two characters’ personalities simply by the way you described their attire. Very well done, my friend!

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    • That would have been a great song, sandylikeabeach!
      Thanks. The hardest part of these challenges is paring everything down to fit. I’m glad it still worked!

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  8. Forgive me for babbling…but that was really cool. I haven’t been able to do the Trifecta thing yet (not good at writing on demand) but you have popped a few ideas in my little brain for further reference.

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    • That’s great Suzanna! The trifecta communtiy (and blogosphere in general) is really supportive for this kind of thing. At least the part I find myself in.
      Have at it and enjoy yourself, and thank you!

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  9. Hi,
    Love it, biker outfit and an apron, you have out done yourself, I thought the story was hilarious, well thought out and with a twist as well, brilliant. :D

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  10. Guap..Dude, I loved this. Really truly. perfect amount of silliness and wordplay.. I could picture the scene… NICELY done! :-)

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  11. Laugh-out-loud funny, Guap. Exposes your wit quite nicely, and in a family-friendly way. <3

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  12. LOL! I’ll have an image of your garden apron in my head all day now….

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  13. Nice job, Guap! Enjoyed it immensely!!

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  14. The need for flashy gardening boots gave my a gift idea for Christmas. Meanwhile, as soon as I read “valley” … lily went off in my head … and then bingo!

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  15. Oh really nice! it’s sort of fiction within fiction within fiction – VERY creative!

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  16. As usual–creative and funny! LOVE THE OUTFITS!

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  17. nice! I loved this one. read it with my cup of tea and bran muffin

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  18. OMG Hahahaha you actually made me really LAUGH. Not just the usual lol *maybe smiled a little* x

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  19. I liked the humor element in this. I totally didn’t see where it was going at first.

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  20. I’ll babble, Baby! This is great! So funny! It is a world inside this world that we’re all responding to. So creative! Loved it.

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  21. whiteladyinthehood

    What an awesome opening paragraph! You rock, Guapo!

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    • thank you very much, whitelady! I can’t tell you how many personal stories that start with “Well, this perfectly normal thing could have happened. Or not…”
      And most of them start in a bar.
      hehehe

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  22. That made me laugh — great take on the prompt.

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  23. I found a Jeff Beck tribute to Les Paul DVD at walmart. Great tunes, and guess who the guest vocalist was? That’s right, Imelda May. Great artist with a powerful voice. check it out

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  24. Snap Snap :+) That was really really great! Nice read and great pictures that it conjoured up in my mind. Well done.

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  25. I just wanted to tell you that I am ignoring you because you don’t want to hear from me. Nice post though…

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  26. Thanks for linking up with Trifecta this week. I dig this post. And the apron. Fantastic response to the prompt, really. I love the idea of two characters meeting to play out the prompt. I can see the whole thing go down. It’s all very meta. Very high brow. :-) Thanks for playing, El Guapo. See you back soon.

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  27. Congrats on your second place finish in the competition, though I thought you should have won the gold!

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  28. Congratulations El Guapo on coming in second place this week! You are a winner! Every week in my book! :D

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  29. a wonderfully played out scene, Guapo… like everyone, I love the fiction w/in fiction (recursive = fractal like) w/in fiction… I was a little lost at first trying to get the logistics of it all, but you pulled an elephant outta that hat, sir!!! congrats on placing!!! I’m wondering which fella was really you?
    :)

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  30. Your writing is so visual, I can PICTURE him holding up the cell phone and this entire conversation taking place. I love it. I hope you are also writing a novel. :)

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  31. Got me at the end with the pun – the gardening get up I found arousing – time for a cup of tea and stern talking to myself. Loved it!

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  32. This is a lot of fun! Love this playful take on the prompt. :)

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Ahem *best Ricky Ricardo voice* Babble-OOOoooo!!!

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