Tag Archives: Holidays

Friday Foolishness – Purposeful Edition


Today’s Music: American Bang – Move To The Music

A busy week – Angels! Christmas! Santa! Blogs!
Here’s a few of the great posts I read:
The Bumble Files took “drivin’ the road to christmas” to a new (and hilarious) extreme! Adair You showed us (with instructions) why she is the Queen of Napping, and in a more serious post, and Flies Over Nebraska put up one about fishing that isn’t really about fishing. But is a great, thoughtful read.

Thanks to them, and all of you, for a week of fun reading, on xmas stuff and so much more!
NapTime
Last week, we asked about something it sounded like many would have enjoyed this past week – Naps! And there were some very strong (and occasionaly disturbing) thoughts about them. Here’s what you said. (As always, my comments are snuggled in italics.)

My blankie to hold against my cheek so I have sweet dreams! Benzeknees
(Blankie..? Wait – that was you on the bus?!?)
An orgy of course ;) Androgoth
(In that case, you’ll want a nap first!)
Being a salaried sleeper. Red.
(Ah, so a gov’t job for you?)
A night of wickedness with Elvira Mistress of the Dark… Androgoth
(Are naps long enough to have nightmares?)
Sex, bacon, and sex involving bacon. And wine. – Hotspur
(If you’re like most guys, that’s just a prelude to the nap. And a BLT.)
Nutella. GiggsMcGill Jill
(Don’t you mean Napella, the dreamy stuff from which dreams are made? Or is that bourbon?)
Hanging from the chandelier crazy monkey sex. x, Becca
(I’d go crazy too having sex hanging from a chandelier. Nothing to brace yourself against…)
Sex with bacon flavored lube – Stuphblog
(Wouldn’t your pecker get caught in the top of the bottle?)
…and we have a winner! (haha I cheated)
(Everyone wins at Camp Guapola!
(Yeah, I said it.)
(hehehe…)

A nap followed by cookies! And apparently, I’m four years old. L&L
(You really should ask an adult for permission before coming here. And turn in any adult that gives it to you.)
Strong pain meds! (JohnE- Chicago Ballot Stuffer)
(I bet you need painkillers after stuffing yourself in a ballot box!)
Strong pain meds! (John E- Chicago Ballot Stuffer)
(Meds that apparently affect short term memory…)
Strong pain meds! (John E- Chicago Ballot Stuffer)
(Ok big fella, I think you’ve had enough!)
REALLY strong pain meds! All the dreams in a fourth the time! (John E)
(Exactly how strong are those meds , anyway?)
one that has sassy one-liners. “Oh nap!” – calahan
(That about (flannel) covers it.)
Two naps (Carrie Rubin)
(WE HAVE A WINNER!!!)
A Hillary Clinton Coma of Convenience Linda Vernon
(I think the rest of gov’t will be adopting that strategy…)
The afternoon wine that precedes the nap. Elyse 54.5
(Start with morning wine. Trust me on this.)
Napping while cuddling a Panda – Becca 25tofly
(So that explains those bamboo pajamas…)
naps are for saps
(Hey, that’s MR. Sap to you!)
a nap with my kitty & my man <3 (words&otherthings)
(Are you sure you’re thinking of naps when you’re all in bed together??
(What? Cats like attention.)

Come on, Guap! There is ONE thing….(Stacy)
(I thought we agreed to never speak of our affection for Andy Griffith…)
a nap in a hammock, someplace tropical. Alex: )
(In the Caribbean, I can get us a good deal on a hammock made of local…weeds…)
A second nap! KJ
(Wow, WE HAVE ANOTHER WINNER!!!)
Taking Guapo and his girl to Skyline Chili. (Frank)
(Do they have pillow on the menu?)

Congratulations to Carrie Rubin)\and KJ for what is honestly the perfect answer! And from the offered choices, the most popular was Is that a serious question???. God, I love you people!
broken-resolution
And here we are at this week. The last foolishness of the year, the foolishness where we take all that has gone before, and tie up the loose ends in a nice little bow to bring it all to a head!
Or, we could just ask a stupid question.
Yeah, lets go with that!
In a few days, you all (possibly while drinking too much champagne) will shout out, as the calendar ticks over, your new years resolution.
Last year we asked What you resolved. And I think we all know how that turned out.
So this year, how about a “day after” question about those resolutions in the new year.
So resolve to answeroften, resolve to answer wisely (or not). But resolve to answer by 2359, 3 Jan, 2013, because that’s when this one ends.


So, I have no idea if I’ll post again before the end of the year. If I don’t, I’d like to take a moment to thank everyone for your company and friendship this year, and I hope every last one of you, all of you and yours, get everything you hope for in 2013!

And just in case you’re worried that I’m getting all maudlin and sappy, I leave you with these:
I think everyone should be able to marry, as long as their partner (of whatever race, creed, religion or gender) is willing. But for those of you who aren’t sure, this should be incentive enough.

Friday Foolishness – On and on and on and… Edition


Today’s Music: Warren Zevon – Werewolves of London

On a serious note before we start – to all those affected by the hurricane this week, I hope you all weathered it with your usual style and panache, and that normalcy is returning to your part of the world.
For those interested, the Red Cross is collecting to help those that were devastated by the storm.
And if there’s anything you can think of I can do to help you out, just let me know.
And away we go…

That last kit-kat did me in…


Oh, that was fun. Trees bending, tunnels filling with water. Beaches being washed away, Trumps hair seething in the rain, and all of the MTA closed for a few days.
How does one weather a hurricane? Why, by reading blogs, of course!
Here’s some of what I saw.
butimbeautiful gave us her instructions on finding happiness
Mike Calahan shared his younger selfs’ adventures in movie making, and Hasty Words wrote a great poem about coworkers.
You and everyone else made this week a little easier to get through!

Which brings us full circle to last week. The poll asked What is your Halloween costume?
And regardless of how you’re dressed on the outside, you all are hilariously outlandish on the inside!
Here’s what you said. (As always, my comments are searching for candy in italics.)

Mitt Romney, now that is definitely scary… Androgoth
(But his hair is perfect. (Anyone? Anyone?))
I loathe Halloween
(That’s the spirit! Now just add moaning and a clanking chain.)
Usual night out clothes. Serial killers look like regular folks -Miss R
(You could pop your collar. That scares the crap out of me.)
Lily Munster, cause I don’t have to get changed-butimbeautiful
(You need a Herman, so you can rest your drink on his head.)
Stepping on giant spider gave me costume idea: (slutty)spider buster! -asplenia
(And your sidekick, (Slutty) Dustbuster Guy!)
Someone pretending to care that it’s Halloween.–Lily in Canada
(*Someone pretending to write a pithy response*)
A famous, published author – me! Benzeknees
(Go as a spray painter. Everyone will see your work!)
Dick Whitington, but the Cat can naff off… Androgoth
(I think Dick was just a mouthpiece for the cat.)
Well it won’t be anything like Frankenstein’s tart, she is on the next bus :( Androgoth
(No wearing the other revelers, Andro. hehehe…)
Myself, that is definitely scary enough I think? :) Androgoth
(Aww, that’s so cute!)
The girl who’s not good at making costumes… (jillianlevi)
(Go as the Charlie Brown swiss cheese/ghost?)
A Happy Zombie (better than a depressed human) (Stacy)
(I bet the guy whose face you just ate doesn’t think so!)
A squirrel in a pink tutu..awindowintothewoods
(Beats those pink elephants I see after my morning tequila coffee…)
If Hotspur would show his face, I’ll go as HIM! – words&otherthings
(EEEEEK!!!)
BUTTON cracked button ;-) LizzieC
(How about Red Buttons?)
a big cracked butt ..LizzieC
(So a plumber then?…)
Group costume. Making life sized binders, full of women & blow up dolls. -Quirky
(WE HAVE A WINNER!!!)
Someone who’s had too much candy. Carrie Cannibalistic Nerd
(I won’t even have to buy a new outfit for that!)
Sawed in half/ badly reattached half Romney (left side) Obama (right) -B_T
(Since it’s a political costume, you should stress the “disjointed”.)
Mother Nature (my daughter picked it)
(Next year, bring the treats, leave the tricks. And you owe us a new tree.)
Roadkill (sandylikeabeach)
(Often confused on Halloween with “buffet”…)
El Guapo in a Flying Suit with Jets (Frank)
(Leading to next years costume,El Guapo with a big grin in a full body cast!)
Noncommitted (Kanerva)
(Wait – does that mean no straitjacket?)
Donald Trump — my hair’s a mess (Elyse 54.5)
(If you’re Donald Trump, the hair is the least of your problems!)
I can’t tell you,it’s a secret but I’ll post pics. KJ
(You’re the “Where’s Waldo” of Halloweeners.)
A bored suburban housewife from Ohio. SnaapyG
(Mix it up a little. Go as a bored housewife from New Jersey.)
a person who no longer gives a fuck – Rodney Dangerfield
(Rodney Dangerfield is dead. Go as his zombie version!)

Congratulations to Quirky for this weeks winning answer! And from the offered choices, the most popular was Slutty Chewbacca. RooaAWwwrrRRrr!

So here we are at this week. Big news here is the elections. I’m voting Obama, and I hope you do the same. As Androgoth noted, Mitt Romney is scary.
But that’s not the poll.
This week is falls between the anniversary of the very first poll, and the first time it was called Friday Foolishness.
Which means that, after a year of doing these, it’s all about you. that’s right folks. We’re asking what you’ve learned from these polls!
Pour out your life lessons, and pour as often as you like, but pour them before 2359 EST on 8 Nov, because that’s when this one closes.


And until we meet again, I leave you with these.
Before he was Mr. Bean, Rowan Atkinson was a stand up comedian.
The first clip has stuck with me for years. Rowan Atkinson as a priest:

And Rowan Atkinson as the Devil:

Have a great week everyone. See you on the flipside…

Friday Foolishness – Masked Edition


Today’s Music: Django Reinhardt – Honeysuckle Rose

Wheeee! And around we go again, to the edge, the lip – dare I say verge? – of the weekend! And what better way to get yourself in a silly shenanigan-esque mood than the Friday Foolishness?
What would the week now ending have been without blog reading? No idea, and I don’t want to find out. Here’s just a tiny fraction of what I enjoyed this week:
Sights N Bytes stretched his writing muscles with a new series, completely different for him. The Girl in the Cat Frame Glasses came back!
And WhatIMeant2Say put up a sarcastically hilarious post about unhelpful advice for the depressed.

Thanks to them and all the rest of you for giving me plenty of great things to read all week long.

And one last note: I’ve gone on (probably add nauseum) about how y’all are the coolest people in the sphere. Last night I was lucky to grab a beer at the Corner Bistro with Brain Tomahwak and Love and Lunchmeat. And now I can say I also know some of the coolest people in the real world.
Thanks, I had a blast!

Something else I did all week long was go through the answers from last weeks poll. We asked What’s In Your Junk Drawer?, and your answers were anything but junk. (As always, my comments are unidentifiable and gathering dust in italics.)
My Ray Gun and a Spare Pair of Evils :) lol Androgoth
(Can I borrow one of those? I used all my evil at the DMV.)
My shameful toys… (I meant Barbies and all the old toys!! Gutter mind…-jill)
(Doesn’t sound too bad. Just hide them under those old copies of Teen Beat you saved…)
Things very “un”vanilla~ Bipolarmuse
(Kitchen junk drawer. Not nightstand junk drawer…)
Whaddya mean junk? That’s my life you’re talking about! butimbeautiful
(In your case we’ll call it a treasure chest…)
Let’s look…Junk, junk… the airplane’s upside down, Stradi-who-vius? ~B_T
(Your teenage son or daughter will think this wishbone necklace is really cool. (Google it.))
My Zombie Cattle=Prod, Now Where The Hell Is It? Androgoth
(Does it zap them in the brains?)
“To open a can of spam” -well it won last week but maybe it’s too soon? Lindav
(WE HAVE A WI– Wait – what?)
My junk. – Hotspur
(Next you’ll be saying you keep the bodies in the freezer. How typical.)
It really is not a whole drawer. It has a false bottom. Secret false bottom. Red
(I was wondering how you stashed a chainsaw in there…Red? RED?!?)
Don’t have one right now, it sucks. Junk scattered – Carrie Cannibalistic Nerd
(Scavenger hunt for the missing measuring tape!)
priceless..irreplaceable items..awindowintothewoods
(Because after the revolution, twist-ties will be currency.)
Why my Herman Munster slippers of course… Androgoth
(There’s probably a zombie cattle prod snuggled comfily inside them…)
My Rubik’s Cube, Pet Rock and Mood Ring. Michelle Motley News
(So where are you storing disco and your Betamax tapes?)
Dog hair.. When you have 13 dogs, their hair is everywhere. Michelle Motley News (again)
(When you fill the drawer, you can knit an Afghan. Or a Poodle.)
. . . These are a few of my favorite things! Benzeknees
(Please let the kittens with whiskers out of the drawer, Benze.)
My life is kind of a junk drawer, really. I’m a work in progress.
(Your life is a collection of chip clips and crumpled post-it pads? Or is that just me?)
Hahahahaha id,tell you but i.cant open it lizziec
(Pity. There’s a really great reply to this in there!)
Duct tape, a mango pit, nail clippers, and a half-eaten grilled cheese sandwich.
(WE HAVE A WINNER!!!)
(continued from ducttape grilled cheese): 47 cents, &a mini-mag light.-asplenia
(Ok, ok. We get it , Macgyer)
My bet B.O.B. and a crap load of batteries.
(You don’t call it “Robert”? It’s longer…)
The real question is what’s NOT in my junk drawer. – 25tofly
(Nono, that’s next weeks poll.)
the neighbour’s dead cat, God that thing stinks (SnB)
(Good thing you tested it before you stuffed your neighbor in there!)
All the things I can’t find. Elyse 54.5
()
The one that has dozens of kickball championship wristbands! :) Quirky
(Those should be on display. NOBODY PUTS KICKBALL IN A JUNK DRAWER!!!)
A dirty old rag and….that’s it. (words&otherthings)
(Mm Hmm. Sure it is…)
my kalashnikovs. Cheap rent for every blogger! NBI
(You want a bunch of bloggers to move into a drawer with rifles? What could possibly go wrong?)
The Big Mac list that is too long for this answer box. (Frank)
(Better in the junk drawer than your stomach!)
A better question: What’s not in my junk drawer? Grippy
(Better? Maybe. Shorter answer? Definitely!)
Funky junk. sandylikeabeach
(Marky Mark would like that back please.)
Michael Jackson’s chimp, Bubbles. KJ
(It’s keeping the skeleton of the Elephant Man company.)
My ego. ~Emily@The Waiting.
(Right there under the commemorative Dave and Busters Grand Reopening whoopie cushion!)
Congratulations to Asplenia for a winning inventory list! And from the offered choices, the most popular was a tie again, between Hoffa’s Teamster ring. and All the bodies I could fit. The rest are in New Jersey. So congratulations to all you happily demented folk as well!

This week, we’re going topical. Like a cream. As you all know, there’s a holiday coming. Yes, St Jude/St Simon day celebra- Hmm? Hallo-what? Is that the one with the shadow? Matzah? What’s that? Candy and monsters? There’s a preschool holiday?!? Ohhhh – Halloween. Why didn’t you say so?
This week, we’d like to know who you’ll be going as. Someone you love? Someone you hate? The real you?
Let us know. Just scare us with your alter ego before 1 November, 2359 EST.
And if you leave a write in, let me know who you are and I’ll link back to you next week.


There you have it,folks.
In closing,, I leave you with this.
Two hilarious versions of the same goofiness.

And just a bit more silly, that I found from from the talented blogger and published author, Carrie Rubin
Updated – Thanks to Starla’s Chat for pointing out embedding was disabled. You’ll have to click the link for the video,but it is entertaining!

Until next time, have a great week y’all!

A Snaapy Post


Today’s Music: VeggieTales: The Pirates Who Don’t Do Anything Silly Song (NOTE: This is probably the Only. Time. Ever. I will post one of these songs. It was ridiculously painful)

As the world spun earlier today, and time crept forward across the planet, something happened. Something Magical.
The date changed.
And it became 30 April. The world became engulfed in the unstoppable march of this date, and the world reveled in it.
Why?
What’s so important about 30 April?

It’s Ginger Snaap‘s birthday!!!!
Get out your sunglasses, because shininess reigns for a solid 24 hours!

He's celebrating.

Actually, shininess always reigns where Ginger is. Whether trash talking with the soccer moms, or pointing out the errors of his ways to Mountain Man, Ginger is just a bundle of joy.

Ginger unwrapped her present early.

Who can resist her wit? Her kindness towards crazy people? (She’s their leader!) And her weekday twitter dance parties?
Truly the stuff of legend, much like the woman herself!
So join in the celebration!
Let yourself go!
And if people are blinded at your joy today, well, that’s just Ginger Snaap’s shininess reflecting off us all!

Yeah, too bright even for him.

Or maybe they’re blinded by the awesome dance moves.

Doin' the happy birthday dance!

Happy Birthday Ginger Snaap!

Program Notes and Trifextra


Today’s Music: The National – Mistaken For Strangers

Usually around this time is when I throw in my weekend Trifextra, if I’m playing.We’ll get to that in a minute.
First, to you and yours and all to whom this is appropriate, Happy Passover and Happy Easter. Both are stories of redemption and freedom, and of love for your neighbor.
For me (generally non-religious), those are themes even a cynic like me can get behind.
I hope you all have a wonderful time weekend, even if you don’t celebrate.

Next, I saw something incredible last night on twitter. @bats0711(also with a blog here) put up a post that frightened many of her virtual friends.
They instantly rallied, sending supportive messages and trying to get her to respond to make sure she was ok.
Because some of these tweeters and bloggers are people I have the highest respect and affection for (don’t tell one of them that – she’ll never let me live it down. Yes, she knows who she is.), I also joined in, commenting on her blog and tweeting to her. Mostly a series of stupid, mildly amusing comments. So she could see that living in my head is probably worse than living in hers…
At one point, she did tweet back, that she was surprised and amazed at the thoughts and affection directed to her. She hasn’t tweeted or posted since that last night though. So if you could, tweet her a line or drop her a comment.
Mostly I was just in awe at the rallying and assumption of responsibility for someone who was in pain and seemed to just want acknowledgement of it.
Seriously, it gave me the warm fuzzies all over.

And now for those of you who need your fix of mindless babble, I am only to happy to comply

Here are the challenge parameters:
The challenge is to write a response that is between 33 and 333 words long and uses the words listed below. Use the words however you wish, but make sure that all three appear in your response. Oh, and they must appear in order.

Good luck!

cacophony
soap
insects


The Perfect Sound

The “band rehearsal space” wasn’t a grand studio area like it sounded.
It was the center of the studio apartment, with beds, tv and shelves all pushed in the corners away from the equipment.
Working as a band, they were even closer than a family. Or trauma survivors. Though sometimes it seemed like trauma survivors had it easier…
So it was no surprise that when Jake decided to wash Barnaby, the golden labrador and band mascot, he did it on the middle of the rehearsal area. It was the largest free space in the place.
What was a surprise was when the dog got away.

The cymbals tipped over with a reverberating crash, echoing and rebounding off the walls. The accordion, knocked from its stand, fell in a way that let its bellows compress with the longest most annoying sound possible. Wires and pickups got toppled together, gain and feedback multiplying from the amps as the bass and guitar strings twanged through them, resonating against each other ever more loudly. The piano reverberated in sympathy setting up a screaming wall of sound.

Tom and Aaron watched as Barnaby shot past, Jake running behind.
“Sorry for the cacophony!!!” shouted Jake over the din, puffs of soap dripping from his arms. “Just gotta wash those insects off him!” he continued, closing on the dog.
The bedlam continued until Barnaby, seeing Jenna coming in, sensed his opportunity and shot out the door. Jake took off after him, the sounds of barking and chaos trailing in his wake.

The instruments wailed into silence.

Tom turned to Aaron behind the mixing board.
“Tell me you got that.”
Aaron smiled. “Got it.” He pumped his fist. “It’ll be a number one, baby!”
___________________________________________________________________________________–

Have a great weekend all. As for me, I have 18 minutes to finish this batch of matzah I’m going to make!

Friday Foolishness – Glorious Leader Edition


Today’s Music: Animaniacs – Presidents (A bit outdated. And a cartoon. But a great song!)
Days Til Spring: 31

I had an okay week – nobody got hurt, nobody died. I’ll chalk that up as a win.
There were a few posts that caught my eye this week.
H.E. Ellis had an in depth sit down with Cupid; Edward Hotspur waxed philosophical on blogging while using the longest non-technical word in the English language, floccinaucinihilipilification; and Ginger Snaap regales us with her Valentines Tweets
Thanks to you guys (and everyone else out there) for making the days a little more fun as I traveled through my week…

Oh, and we all made it through Valentine’s Day! Now I can get back to my normal irreverent frame of mind.
And for Valentine’s Day, y’all had a lot say in last weeks poll.
Here are the “Other” answers:
(As usual, my comments are in italics)
Going to the beach! Chocolate always tastes better dipped in sand.
(Um…where did you get that recipe from?)
Time to break out the special Valentines evening wear. John Phillips
(I did too! Latex – ah, the smell of it…)
I’ll be here
(And it was appreciated! Hope I didn’t syrup-overload you…)
i’m sleeping all day. -Goradde
(Nothing says romance like bed-pigging!)
Help! I’ve got 3 humans & 1 cat counting on me. Now Accepting Ideas!
(Hearts with names written on them dangling from a long string of red silk?)
I’m painting hearts with a folded toilet paper roll. No, really.
(No name with this, but I think it might have been Jell Jell – or more accurately, the adorable EB. Who does much more interesting (and acceptable) things with commode accessories than I ever did!)
Blogging
(Sorry, was that blogging or flogging?)
Lots of really hot masturbation.
(So is that self abuse, or self love? And does one make the other even hotter?)
Im going to decide where to shop the next day to get 50% off stuff. Hobbler
(It’s like Christmas! But with shorter lines!)
What about chocolate covered brraaiinnnsss!!!! Linda V
(THE WINNER!!!!)
(This prize is shared with ThoughtsAppear, who came so close to the same answer in the comments)

Aphrodisiac dinner and sex…you know, another Tuesday. Red
(Hey, we’re all invited to dinner at Red’s next week!!!!) (hehehe)
I’m giving her 2 tickets to the Monster Truck Rally!!! Rich Crete
(Because you are romanc- Wait – tickets for you and her, right?)
I hope to break the 358 days straight of no sex… ~flame
(I believe all of us are rooting for you! Oh, and pics or it didn’t happen. (hehehe))
All of the above (except Meg Ryan, and football, and sex – what’s that? Kanerva
(So…chocolate, and shooting people with a compound bow. Wow. PARTY AT KANERVA’S!!!)
I will ignore it in order to see if she notices.
(Oh, I can’t see that going well at all…)
I’m having sex with someTHING. I hope… G Snaap
(That line above about pictures? Yeah, ignore that one…)
Buy myself flowers and thank Hubby profusely for getting them for me!
(Better yet, thank someone else and really get his attention!)

Thank you for broadening (and occasionally assaulting) my definition of Valentine’s Day!
Congratulations to Linda and Thoughtsy on picking the winning Other answer, and the most popular of the choices offered was “I’m eating chocolate!!! Maybe I’ll even share…”
Congratulations to all of you too!

And now (continuing the series of polls that seem like they are related to something but really really aren’t), this weeks poll!
With Presidents Day coming in the US, I thought we might consider widening the scope of the holiday. So…

So, until next time, I leave you with these two videos.
I think this is a very cool thing for a President to do:

And the Presidential Oath of Office – FDR to Obama

Have a great weekend everyone, and for those that get it, enjoy your Monday off!

More about The Most Wonderful Girl In The Universe (because some is just not enough…)


Today’s Music: Louis Armstrong – What a Wonderful World
Days Til Spring: 34

(This is continued from yesterday’s post)

When it came time to plan our wedding, we both had exactly the same ideas:
- It should be small, so we could enjoy the time with our guests
- It should cost less then the downpayment on a good house
- It should be…unique.

We checked out a
Farm Museum. They include a hayride!
Central Park Carousel. Beautiful, but small, and for a place with fake horses, it smelled a lot like real horses.
Top of the Rock (Rooftop observation deck of Rockefeller Center). Great view, but what would it cost?

It turns out that renting Top of the Rock is $25k. Before food,band, or anything really. Just for the space.
And not even the good space. It’s for an enclosed terrace with a very limited view.
The manager must have seen our crestfallen expression and taken pity on us.
“Of course, if you wanted to”, she went on, “you could just by tickets for the observatory for you party and just show up. the only condition would be” – we held our breath – “you couldn’t block off the space from other visitors,
and you couldn’t bring a professional photographer”.
We looked at each other. No professional and random strangers wandering through our wedding?
PERFECT!!!

The view from the wedding altar


Once we started, the staff couldn’t have been nicer. They did gave us some space on one end of the platform and thanked us at the end for picking their place to have our wedding.
The minister, on the other hand, had no idea what to do with us.
She was a non-denominational minister. Since my girl and I are of different faiths (and neither devout), we chose someone who could bring spirituality to the ceremony without dogma.
Poor woman.
She was hesitant to say “Mawwiage”, but all our friends caught the reference.
At one point during the ceremony, when my girl leaned over to kiss me, she told us (jokingly) to knock it off.
My girl’s response: “Have you met us?”
But she took it in stride when I stuck my tongue out at my girl (when she was telling the story of how my girl turned me down for the Harry Connick Jr date). Because she totally deserved it.
We got married on a Thursday. I took the day off and went in Friday.
Several of my wife’s co-workers took a long lunch and crashed the wedding. Her boss forced her to take Friday off too.

And I'm never letting go.


That was four years ago, eleven since we first started dating. Here are some snippets from our life together…
- Every night ends with the following (both of us say each line)
“Good night (pretty/handsome) (nickname)”
“Happy Valen-(nickname) -day”
“I love you”
I don’t think we’ve skipped more than a small handful of nights.
- I will poke her constantly. She retaliates by scratching my palms. Because that freaks me out.
- I will, when opportunity present itself, lick her nose. She will get back at me by slobbering my entire face.
- She keeps a spray bottle filled with water to squirt me with if I tickle her.
- I can count the number of yelling arguments we’ve had over the years on both hands. Without taking my mittens off.
- If she tells me seriously that I’m being a jackass, I will (after I shake off the frustration) think about and change what I’m doing.
- She has her own custom made action figure, commissioned by a friend.
- When my bungee jumping plans fell through, she found a place in Portland that was reliable.
- She knows how to tie a cherry stem in a knot with her tongue. I carried it in my wallet for years.
- She is the only person who has ever been able to get me to take care of my diabetes.
- I have gone to flower shows because she wanted to see them. (To be honest, she was right – they’re pretty cool).
- She is incredibly well read in history, fantasy and science fiction.
- I will never forgive her for referring to Hemmingway’s The Old Man And The Sea as “A Boy And His Fish”.
- She can quote Douglas Adams with the best of them.
- I love her so much that I have taken her to see both Depeche Mode and Pink live. And before you say “So?”, the Ting Tings opened for Pink. I would rather have gotten ringworm.
- Her only bridezilla moment was insisting we get married on our anniversary.
- My family likes her better than me.
- When separated in a large store, I will yell out “WIFE!” and listen for the answering “Husband!” (Because she has decorum and doesn’t bellow in public like I do.)
- She is queen of saying “Yes dear”.
- And sticking her tongue out at me. (He deserves it – TMWGITU)
- Sometimes, when she reads over my shoulder as I write these posts, she twists my ponytail into a knot. (Like now!)
- She bakes incredible scones. And turned me on to clotted cream.
- Starting a life with her is the smartest thing I ever did.
- Her choosing me is the best thing that ever happened to me
- If you were wondering, yes. The first year we were together, she took me to see Harry Connick Jr. Because she is that cool.

That’s about all I’m going to say. Because it’s been about 45 minutes of me playing on my machine, and I really want to go tell her I love her.
Bet I’ll get a kiss!

Happy Valentine’s Day, all. Have a great day no matter what you do, and every day after too.