Some babblings and a Vulgar Trifecta


Today’s Music: Lindsey Buckingham – Seeds We Sow
Days Til Spring: 14!!!

Yes, I got Freshly Pressed. Which means my fingertips are now killing me from answering comments.
Which doesn’t take away from how cool it was to get turned on in an instant to so many other blogs and points of view. It will probably take a while to poke through all of them, but I’m looking forward to it.
Something else about the FP – a notification was sent to me by WP to tell me it happened.
The title of the editor that sent me the email is Word Wrangler. Possibly the coolest job title I’ve ever seen.

So thank you, WP for the nod. Thanks to everyone that wandered over to check me out. And for those of you that hung around, hope you enjoy the madness that lurks in these parts!

So this week, Trifecta’s challenge was the third definition of the word “Vulgar”:

vulgar (adj) \ˈvəl-gər\
1: generally used, applied, or accepted
2: vernacular
3 a : of or relating to the common people : plebeian
b : generally current : public
c : of the usual, typical, or ordinary kind

You might also like the entries from Edward Hotspur, ODNT, and The Hobbler.

And check out all the entries linked from Trifecta. You might find yourself inspired to jump in!

Perspective

The steward rose with the sun.
He toured the house, checking that all was pristine from the night before.
In his chambers, he made up the chore list for the day, all instructions neatly and clearly written.
He moved through the servants quarters gently waking the other employees of the Manor with his bell.
Without coaxing, they all moved to their positions, organizing themselves for the day.

Cooking, cleaning, sewing, tailoring, all tasks were completed smoothly, with a minimum of fuss.
By midmorning, the grounds crew were completing their tending of the yard greenery as the Lord watched, looking up from his luncheon on the veranda.

The crew carried baskets, carefully collecting their cuttings to leave no trace of their passing except a perfectly manicured garden.

The Lord spat a piece of gristle from his hamsteak onto the linen table cloth, wiping his mouth with a gilded, brocaded sleeve.
“Laborers” he spoke. “How vulgar”.
Replied the steward, “Yes, m’Lord”.

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95 responses to “Some babblings and a Vulgar Trifecta

  1. A nice take on the definition. And congrats again on the entry into the Freshly Pressed ranks.

    Like

  2. “The Lord spat a piece of gristle from his hamsteak onto the linen table cloth, wiping his mouth with a gilded, brocaded sleeve.”

    I ADORE this sentence. Nicely written, Johnny Guapo. And thanks for the mention. You’re one of my favorite people in the Blog-i-verse. Or Guap-i-verse. Or whatever.

    P.S. Please shoot me an email explaining this whole FP when it’s convenient for you. I am neither intelligent nor hardworking enough to research it on my own. Thanks. 🙂

    Like

  3. Congrats, you have officially reached nirvana

    Like

  4. AgrippingLife

    Excellent, m’Lord. This was another time and place, very unexpected and original. Great job!

    Like

  5. Well done on the Vulgar Trifecta, it’s not at all what I was expecting when I clicked it! ; )

    And, of course, congrats again on your Fresh-Press-ness! That fact that you replied to all those comments shows not only how cool you are, but also that it was indeed well deserved. I’m still grinning!

    Like

  6. Thanks for the shout out, and I love your post. Wonderful imagery throughout. Such a perfect description for “vulgar” and ironic as well.

    Like

  7. I have choosen you for the Versatile Blog Award! If you have it sorry lol
    http://laurenscrazyjourney.wordpress.com/2012/03/06/the-versatile-blog-award/

    Like

  8. I like your story! Simpler times. I wish people only had to worry about cooking and cleaning and pleasing their lords. Eww gristly pieces of meat are so gross.
    Can’t believe you got Freshly Pressed! That’s awesome! Congrats! Being a blog wrangler sounds like one of the coolest jobs for sure.

    Like

  9. Congrats on the FP! Yay!

    Like

  10. Congrats to you! How exciting! You must be beside yourself with glee. I would pee my pants if I got pressed so hats off to you!
    And nice post and music. I adore LB, and you of course!

    Like

    • Thank you, zen!
      Mostly I’m just bemused. I’m not ungrateful, I just don;t understand why they picked that instead of all the other great posts out there…

      Love listening to LB solo versus Fleetwood Mac.

      Like

  11. Yes, hip-hip-hurray for freshly pressed! This is how I found your blog and so happy I did! I dream of the day I awake to find an email from WordPress notifying me that I have been freshly pressed. That would be out-of-this-world awesome!
    By the way, I know you are super busy responding to a myriad, in every sense of the word, of comments, so please feel free to skip replying to this one. =)
    Congratulations!!!
    -Cindy

    Like

    • Thank you Cindy.
      One of my favorite parts of this is the conversations in the comments, so I’ll probably never skip the comments.
      I’m looking forward to reading your site.
      That I haven;t been able to get to yet. But I will!

      Like

  12. Congrats on getting Pressed! Hope you get lots of enduring readers. I liked that he spat before saying how vulgar. It emphasized the contrast between his perception (title!) and the reality.

    Like

  13. Freshly Pressed! Congratulations EG! It couldn’t have happened to a nicer guy! Truly! Your the Best. And wow! Your Trifecta piece! It’s perfect! I love the way you did that! That punch at the end. It reminds me of my favorite movie of all time, Remains of the Day! And loved the music choice. You are on a roll, Sir Guapo!! 🙂

    Like

  14. This was a great juxtaposition of your story and my comment that contained a large word! Nice. And yeah, tell me all about getting freshly pressed, so I’ll know, because it’s the only way I’m going to know. You’re just too cool! I’m not worthy.

    I thought your story would be about porn, though. And word wrangler is right up there with fluffer. Oh, sorry if I raised the rating of your blog. I’m so vulgar.

    Like

  15. always late for the party…. having to find a space so far away…. ~sigh~ Great Entry…loved the depiction and the use of the word….did you go for the 333? I didn;t count …. actually perfect use of the word with its third defintition – brilliant stunning! I just got my second wind it seems – and there it goes…… Hey the next step is an action figure… Why did Hotspur think your story would be about porn? I think mine shall be about porn…. It’s nearly done but I could add the word porn… what does vulgar porn mean to you…. I don;t think I have had one single decent thought string and I am terribly sorry – Good job.. 🙂

    Like

    • Thanks! And there’s always room for you lizziec.
      I refuse to answer the question about vulgar porn on the grounds that I may embarrass the hell out of myself.

      I just wrote this one without trying for a specific word count. Came in just under 200, I think…

      Like

      • well it is really good – 🙂 can I get my own space at the top – like a handicap spot – mentally something I forget so much on the way down here…. great music choice to btw – I meant to say that earlier but I was winded….I already have my Trifecta written just didn;t want to do too much in one day – but I am totally intrigued now by the thought of vulgar porn – hmmmm …:-D

        Like

        • WAIT! – it isn;t an action figure next – it;s VH-1 The man behind the music and the Fresh Press of the Blogoshere – THEN the action figure! Edward are you handling this all ok? you seem a little I dunno….. sarcastic…oh wait – its all good then right?

          Like

  16. 1. What is the difference between sewing and tailoring…just so I understand what they were all doing.

    2. It doesn’t say that the Lord had a plate or a napkin. Why was the steward remiss in making those things unavailable? I bet it was intentional on the Steward’s part. Surely he knew the hamsteak would be gristly and the Lord would need to spit it out. Bad Steward!! BAD!!!

    Like

    • – sewing is fixing and maintaining,and can go beyond clothes.. Tailoring is altering (as far as i know…)
      – I’m sorry, I thought you would realize that the steward was a paragon of perfection in performance of his duties, and know that the fine china was right there.
      Every one else seemed to get it. Must just be you, WG! 😉

      Like

  17. Hi,
    Congrats on being Freshly Pressed,Well Done, that is just fantastic, and you deserve it as well, you have a great blog. 😀

    I thought your story was great. 🙂

    Like

  18. I love that opposing thing and they way you set it up with the perfection of the servants and the sliminess of the “Lord”. Perfection.

    Like

  19. EG, interesting, well written and well limned. and congratulations on the freshly pressed, which i think u know i got yesterday -or today – i’ve lost track…and yeah, my fingers are VERY tired too. but ain’t it grand? continue…

    Like

  20. Congrats on your previous post being Freshly Pressed! Well deserved. Fabulous blog!

    Like

  21. Well done perspective and congrats again FP – and I reiterate – I remember Guapo when …. I wonder if he remembers me? … Meanwhile, your FP post is tacked on my wall to remind me of what I could be.

    Like

  22. whiteladyinthehood

    Your story was great Guapo!

    Like

  23. Yes, still enjoying the madness. ❤

    Like

  24. I thought this piece was brilliant! You certainly have a way with words, m’Lord. Cheers!

    Like

  25. Very evocative. Do you watch Downton Abbey? Instead of the Lord, you could have substituted Maggie Smith’s Dowager Countess of Grantham. I could SO hear her say that line!

    Like

    • Thanks, Gal.
      Actually, I’ve never seen it. I think my resistance at this point is just me being ornery. Kind of like not going to see Titanic after the rest of the world has raved about it.
      Character flaw I guess…

      Like

  26. This sentence made me gag because it was so well described I could picture it: “The Lord spat a piece of gristle from his hamsteak onto the linen table cloth, wiping his mouth with a gilded, brocaded sleeve.”

    Plus it reminds me of my everyday life with my 4 and 6 year old. You just never know what you are going to step on when you walk around my table. So, who’s vulgar now, Lord? 🙂

    Sorry, I’m punchy today. Loved the piece.

    Like

  27. That sounds like a great source of inspiration in case of no inspiration. Thanks for the tip!

    Like

  28. Eric Murtaugh

    I’m kicking myself over here because I somehow missed the fact that you were Freshly Pressed. Congrats dude! Your subway rant was more than deserving!

    Maybe I missed it because your post was jammed between something about freak snow, surfing, the Wasatch Mountain Range, and snow monkeys. My attention span is worthless if snow monkeys are involved.

    Like

  29. So you were freshly pressed were you? How ghoulish El Guapo and I missed that too, but fame at last me thinks and so Congratulations on that piece of wickedness, you will be getting used to commenting a lot more now so get exercising those fingers and whatever else you can muster… How do you mean what?

    Well, such as hiring a few choice Slaves to help you out on the commenting, perhaps even a team of Nympho Maidens to give you one afterwards… Noooo I meant a massage but hey you never know your luck 🙂 lol

    Have a briliant rest of Hump Day
    and a great start to your Thursday also 🙂

    Androgoth

    Like

    • Thank you, Sir Andro!
      And while I am not sure that Nympho Maidens will help me focus on the comments, I am more than willing to try!

      Hope your week ends well, and a spectacular nine tailed weekend to you! 😉

      Like

  30. Boring snob. Nicely written. I’m angry at this guy.

    Like

  31. The Big Guaposki…freshly pressed…pressed freshly. Congratulations! Well deserved honor!

    Like

  32. Yes indeed! Nice one.

    Like

  33. ‘Vulgar’ has always been a favorite word (which, by coincidence, I used in the title of my most recent post).

    I love the irony implicit in your piece. To me, the most engaging works are not ones in which the reader is slapped with underlying meaning, but rather tickled or nudged with it. Very nice.

    Like

  34. Way to get pressed!

    Loving the title Word Wrangler. Here are some funny ones. In our adult sports league here in town my friend’s respective job titles are Consultant of Leisure, a (female) Pants of the Office, a Grand Pooh-bah of Gear, and an Ambassador of Fun. Love them so much. Underdog rocks.

    Here are more fun Oregon job titles: http://www.oregonlive.com/business/index.ssf/2009/01/oregon_companies_having_fun_wi.html

    Like

  35. Better to be vulgar but tidy, rather than decadent and rude… Seriously ought to get manners taught. I thought the description of the morning routine was so peaceful and nicely written

    Like

  36. Loved your contrast between upstairs and downstairs. All the power and authority is upstairs but all the decency and class is downstairs. This is another great write. And congrats on getting freshly pressed! Hope to see you over the weekend too.

    Like

Ahem *best Ricky Ricardo voice* Babble-OOOoooo!!!

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