A Literary Limerick – The Harry Potter Saga

Today’s Music: Nina Simone – I Put A Spell On You

As promised (threatened?) here is the Harry Potter Limerick Omnibus! (Sounds so much more dignified than it really is…)
None of the limericks have been edited, except for the titles to make them more consistent.

Book One: Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone

A young boy with a scar on his head
His parents, both sadly were dead
When he reached age eleven,
thought he’d been admitted to heaven

But had to fight the “2 headed” teacher instead.

Book Two: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

Everyone said that it was a secret
But Harry’s interest was piqued
Guilderoy was no help –
At his own shadow he yelped.

But with a phoenix, the basilisk was beated.

Book Three: Harry Potter and The Prisoner of Azkaban

The dog in the bushes was mysterious.
Harry though that he might be delirious
There were a wolf and a mouse
In a very haunted house

but the hero, in the end, was Sirius

Book Four: Harry Potter and The Goblet Of Fire

For Harry, the competition was grim
When it got down to Cedric and him.
They went from the maze
to a field full of graves

Soon-to-be-sparkly Diggory died on a whim…

Book Five: Harry Potter and The Order Of The Phoenix

The fighting was close and intense
Splinters and dust clouds so dense
Sirius turned quite pale
As he went through the veil.

Wait a minute – Love is Harry’s defense?!?

Book Six: Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince

Sirius had gone through the veil.
In Dark Arts, Snape threatened Harry with “Fail”
But Harry did more
Hangin’ with Dumbledore.

If only he’d built the balcony a rail

Book Seven: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows – Part One

Find the Horcruxii was what Harry must do.
Set off with friends to defeat You Know Who…
But just like the flick –
though it might make you sick –

this limerick will be split into two.

Book Seven: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows – Part Two

Poor Dobby, he laid down his life.
And Ron pissed off his soon-to-be wife
but Harry stood tall,
one (ring) Wand to rule them all

The epilogue: Harry, with happiness, was rife.

65 responses to “A Literary Limerick – The Harry Potter Saga

  1. There once was a man named El Guapo,
    Whose prose where much more than some guano.
    About Harry he wrote
    And without missing a note,
    He sings each of these with bravado.


  2. Guapa,
    You’re still with the Harry Potty-thingy… Aren’t you afraid of J. K. Rowling?
    Le Clown


  3. Oh joy! I was hoping I’d get a chance to re-read limericks 1-7 (7 having two parts). This really gives “hump day” new meaning — I’m just sayin’, I think this put me over the hump.


  4. You know, I enjoyed each limerick on its own, but having the whole Harry Potter saga up on one page like this. It really speaks to me.


  5. I see you tend to give Suzanne a bit of a hard time as do I, now she’s accusing me of teaming up with you so I felt I better follow you and see what you get up to…


  6. whiteladyinthehood

    Round of applause!


  7. Bravo! I wish I could throw a limerick back but I am limerick challenged. I like the line “At his own shadow he yelped.” I hate to admit this, but I think I’ve yelped at my own shadow before. :+)


  8. 10 likes so far…that’s not so bad 🙂 I’m sure by the end of the day it will reach 100 😉


  9. Love it! I only suck more at limericks than I do with haiku. This rocks!


  10. Although I’ve never seen a Harry Potter movie or read one of the books (reading is for people who are literate, anyway), but because Rowling’s books have so perniciously infiltrated the popular culture, I was able to appreciate most of what you did. For whatever reason, I’m tickled by the “beated” basilisk.


  11. My first comment didn’t go through so reposting. You’re so creative! I hope JKR sees this post. 🙂


  12. These are masterpieces! My favorite thing about these is that if you miss one Harry Potter Limerick there’s plenty more on the next Omnibus! Well Done!


  13. They’re wonderful!


  14. My “sorting hat” is off to you, oh Master of the Limerick…I doth suspect that Shakespeare is rolling around a bit in his grave..( I know he didn’t write limericks)…


  15. Thank you Guapo, now I don’t have to read the books! Very clever of you. 🙂 And really? Did Frank actually rhyme Guapo with guano? Ballsy!


  16. Oh, dear. I fear I’m rather late. Loved them all…I’m hangin’ on for Friday.


  17. It’s hard to find appropriate words that rhyme with “Snape,” I think. (He just doesn’t look like a grape sort of guy.)


  18. You have competition! Frank’s offering was very good :). Good reading one after another in one stream.


  19. Thank you, thank you! And the Nina Simone song makes it all perfect!


  20. STOP. It’s so good. I can’t handle it.


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  22. Guap, it took me way to long to get here, but this is a fabulous collection of the best of the best of Harry Potter. I loved the books and you really did sparkle in writing these, way more than Cedric.


  23. HAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! xD (Okay recovering, sorry.) These are so amazing! Did you come up with them yourself?! If so, you have a true talent, they really are excellent.


  24. Reblogged this on H.E. ELLIS and commented:
    Here is a blog from aperitif from my good friend ElGuapo to cleans your palette between bites of my literary distastefulness.


  25. I love “Ron pissed off his soon-to-be-wife.” Classic. 🙂


  26. Friggin outstanding! I am impressed 🙂


    Lady or Not…Here I Come


  27. Just in case my pingback machine is still broken, you left, ahem, something at my place…or someone did.


  28. Pingback: Friendly Foolishness Fricassee « Kayjai's Blog

Ahem *best Ricky Ricardo voice* Babble-OOOoooo!!!

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