Today’s Music: Squeeze – Goodbye Girl
Days Til Spring: 55
SNOWPOCALYPSE!!!! (Sorry, we’re still in negotiations with Cato. Apparently he won’t appear until we promise to spell his name correctly or something.) Anyway, what can you do when the fluff is flying and you’re out of whipped cream for your hot chocolate (true story!)? Why, read blogs of course!
Here are some great posts I saw this week. Jazzy Beat Chick posted a beautiful ode to her father.The Waiting had a hilarious grade school run-in with beer (though she handled it completely differently than I would have). And Kina Diaz wrote a fantastic post about seeing herself from a completely different perspective
And Spreading Crazy Smiles nominated me for a Shout Out Award! (Possibly because of my catcalling during Chris Christie’s inauguration…) Anyway, I hope you check out her site. I’ve spent some time there, and am already enjoying the hell out of myself.
Thanks to them, and everyone else for giving me great stuff to read this week!
But the question this week is actually the question from last week, or last week’s poll, which asked what does the cow say?. And wow, were your cows talkative! Here’s what you said. (As always, my comments are grain fed in italics.)
“what does the fox say? ” what? its curious..oh did you say COW? damn LizzieC
(Cow hopes curiosity doesn’t do to him what it did to the cat.)
It’s not what it says, it’s what it wears! (Stacy)
(Cow has a leather fetish.)
baa when he’s trying to pass for a sheep.
(Cow looks like a young William Shatner with that perm.)
you just squeezed my tit..sexual harassment! (SnB)
(Whew! I was afraid I was milking the boy cow!))
What does the fox say?
(The fox says Ylvis should be slapped vigorously about the jowls.)
(The blogger says WHY DID YOU MAKE ME LISTEN TO THIS???)
Chocolate Fondue. ~Maddie Cochere
(The cow wishes he had something to dip besides grass.)
Something really droll in a British accent –The Waiting
(Cow says we are very a-moo-sed.)
That farmer has a fetish for stools, and grabbing my teets… Andro
(Better then the farmer grabbing the cows…stool…)
Stop pulling my tits you great oaf :( Andro
(Cow prefers drinks and whispered sweet nothings first. Perhaps some lemongrass…)
To milk is human; to grill bovine. – Hotspur
(I really don’t want to know what Cow is cooking over there.)
go ahead, audition for jersey shore. I dairy ya! polysyllabicprofundities
(GTL, BABY! (Grass, thatch, lawn.))
Your hands are cold. Red.
(The better to stiffen the udders!)
You’re not touching me with those cold hands! Benzeknees
(It’ll hurt you more than it hurts Cow.)
“For ‘Moo’ Press 2. For ‘Moo Moo’ Press 3. For ‘woof’ Press 4″ – calahan
(MAD COW DEMANDS A LIVE OPERATOR IMMEDIATELY!!!)
“Sanjay–I am your father!”
(Darth Holstein? Is that you?)
Isosceles triangle or, failing that, moo. Linda Vernon
(Cow studies hyperbolic arcs because moons are difficult to jump.)
take the batteries out of this damn thing before your mother loses her mind.Maggie O.C.
(Cows’s aunt will be giving calf a drum set this year.)
Jack! Jack! I’m safer than a beanstalk! Elyse 54.5
(Jack should have just gone to Grandma’s house…)
I told you not to bother me when I’m jumping over the Moon! Elyse 54.5
(But Cow!!! That’s my laundry bag, not a parachute!!!)
My poop is full of nutrients. In 62 days, you can put some in your garden.
(Cow says his doesn’t stink.)
brickhousechick says: “Why buy me when you get my udders for free!”
(WE HAVE A WINNER!!!)
I bet I taste freaking fantastic. thematticuskingdom
(Cow is known for his good…taste.)
ting tang walla walla bing bang. thematticuskingdom
(Cow says he loves you. And chipmunks.)
The cow says you keyed my car. Is that true? Ross Murray
(Cow is lashing out because he’s still jealous I stole his girlfriend in high school.)
Would you like a fresh pie? (Frank)
(Cow definitely belongs on the menu instead of serving it.)
Get your hand off my nipples! Twindaddy
(Cow appreciates warm hands.)
Oi – I’m good with horseradish sour cream. Rutabaga
(Cow just wants to bathe in a Calgon demiglace before she’s taken away. To the dinner table.)
how now but only if it’s not brown.
(Is there a Brown Chicken to go with that Brown Cow?)
(Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?)
Lets all go to the mooovies. Yeah that’s all I got. Kayjai
(And enjoy our popcow! Yeah, right there with ya…)
“Moo. Milk my teats. Harder…harder..YES! Moo.” Not A Punk Rocker
(Umm…I’m not sure that’s milk coming out…)
Congratulations to brickhousechick for this weeks winning answer! And from the offered choices, the most popular was I’m the subject of a poll??? That’s udderly ridiculous! So it…behooves me to congratulate all you merry punsters!
Sadly, I spend a lot of time at my desk. And sometimes, I get frustrated with my coworkers or need to get their attention, so I flick a rubber band to catch their eye.
But that got me thinking…what else could I throw at them? Well, that’s this weeks poll. Answer as often as you like, and other answers up to three times. You even have extra time this week, as I will be out in the real world, and offline next weekend. So get your answers in by Monday, 3 Feb, at 2359 EST. Because that’s when this one closes. Oh, and if you leave an “other” answer, leave an ID if you like, or a mention of it in the comments, and I’ll link back to you next week.
And in parting, enjoy this.
I really don’t drink this much anymore. And I probably wasn’t near as funny when I did…
Have a fantastic weekend, y’all!
(The Foolishness will return in two weeks.)