Able Was I, Ere I Saw Foolishness

Today’s Music: The Feelies – Crazy Rhythms
Days Til Spring: 41

Another long week, but we made it to Friday! And how did we get here? By reading blogs, of course! Here’s some of what I saw… Ericka Clay posted a great piece of fiction that takes place in Brooklyn. Sandy Mitchell wrote the perfect Surfing Metaphor that also works for the rest of life, and Same Burn, Different Flame wrote about the importance of silencing the Little Voices.

Thanks to them, and everyone else for great reading while I was stuck in Canada and all week long.

To be fair, there was no one to stop him when he threw things…

Something I didn’t get to see in Canada were the answers to last weeks poll, where we asked what you should throw at coworkers. And wow, looking at the answers now, I’m amazed any work ever gets done! Here’s what you said. (As always, my comments are on a coffee break in italics.)

Duck! throw it yell it and you warned em so all good Lizzie C
(It’s like confit-ti!)
a brick. works and you have a moment of daze to duck. Lizzie C
(I should have mentioned I work in a rubber room…)
I say flick boogers. x, Becca (LON)
(HR is going to ask the CDC how to quarantine that.)
snappy comebacks – That One Guy
(Coworkers provide such good source material…)
I throw my voice so he doesn’t know it’s me telling him off. The Sailor’s Woman
(That fern is going to get a bad reputation…)
grenades
(I can see why Bruno Mars broke up with you.)
Why would you need their attention? (Stacy)
(Someone has to know to wake me if the boss comes by.)
some really good one-liners….moments of pure brilliance! polysyllabic profundities
(Brilliance has no place in the workplace!!!)
If I throw something at Cimmy, “Nice catch!” should be what I say next.
(Preferably over your shoulder. While running away.)
I don’t have a coworker. I’m a homesteader.
(Showoff.)
My boss – John Phillips
(Don’t hurt your back lifting his ego.)
Nothing. I send emails. Accountants are to introverted for human interaction.
(How about adding lolcatz to “reply alls”?)
Slingshot balls of flarp. Red.
(I like to do bank shots with flubber.)
death stares. It appears I’m good at that. Or else, mosquitos (alive)! NBI
(Just don’t practice the stare in the mirror…)
Bag ‘O Badgers (pat. pending) and my resignation letter ~Miss R
(That’ll teach the Den of Weasels©!)
Flue virus – that should give a few days of rest for both me and them. (List of X)
(Wait – people use sick days when they’re sick???)
A paperclip that hit her in the eye. I stopped after that. Quirky
(Best to go out on a win!)
I throw non sequiturs like there is no tomorrow
(The bananas are effervescent this morning.)
Awesome super-effective original ideas that will nevertheless be ignored. – Hotspur
(I think I’ve worked in that office…)
foolishness. of course. thematticuskingdom
(Scientists are working hard on an aerodynamic foolishness that does not fall flat. Unlike mine.))
Me? Nothing. The kingdom wizard throws curses at them for me. thematticuskingdom
(I hide behind Betsy from Payroll.)
baseball bat. might be hard to smuggle in library. – aliceatwonderland
(Tell them you’re making Malamud’s The Natural come alive!)
fun facts and trivia that can be shared at parties – calahan
(I like to give minutiae on photocopying body parts.)
“up” Linda Vernon
(It’s all fun and games until it lands…)
From the dust on your keyboard, you could flick a dustball – Benzeknees
(If you mean that one creepy guy in Records, I don’t think that’s dust…)
A curve ball (Elyse 54.5 again)
(SEXUAL HARASSMENT!!!)
Popcorn if you know nobody’s packing heat (Elyse 54.5)
(Or socks! If you know no one is packing bags.)
PMAO says; I like to throw myself at my coworkers… wait… I don’t have coworkers
(So much is clear now…)
Glances which state clearly I’m not you’re team-building-activity buddy – Alex A
(I find not catching them during the falling exercise is much more effective than “glances”.
A paper clip shower. The Bumble Files
(With styrofoam conditioner!)
Deodorant. That dude smells really ripe.
(No, that’s just the hopelessness radiating off him.)
All of my coworkers died in a freak office related “accident” –Lily In Canada
(WE HAVE A WINNER!!!)
another co-worker…so many aerodynamic specimens to choose from…Weenie Girl
(Any excuse to use this picture!)

superballs. ummm, that came out sounding weird. – speedo
(And yet, so effective…)
brickhousechick: a confetti of vegan/organic quinoa drenched in pork fat
(The Food Network would like to hire you after you’re fired from that job.)
A collected volume of your blogs~Addie
(Woah! We just want to startle them, not kill them!)
Jelly babies! I know he doesn’t like them so I would get them back! MBT
(Hope he picks off the industrial carpet fibers first…)
Poop. We all need to channel our inner monkey once in awhile. – The Waiting
(*buys raincoat for office*)
My Diet Coke can. Full or empty depends on the amount of rage. Kayjai
(Funny, my tequila bottle has a scale to measure that right on the side.)
Insults – Twindaddy
(Those are best hurled, not thrown.)
gobbets of diseased flesh via catapult – The (Medieval) Mercenary Researcher
(Don’t the other lunch ladies get upset when you throw the meals around?)
Definitely BRRRAAIIIINNNNSSSS (Frank)
(What, and waste mine at work???)
Throw ’em a bone to go with those braiiins!
(…and that’s how caveman baseball was invented!)
Passive aggressive remarks-Not A Punk Rocker
(I suppose if that’s what you think is best…)

Congratulations to Lily In Canada for this week’s winning answer! And from the offered choices, the most popular was BRRRRAAIIIIINNNSSS!!! (Hey! It works!) So glad to see we’re all using brains at work for something.

We loved Walter White. We cheered on Dexter.We wept at the trials of that guy in those viagra commercials.
They all have some things in common: they’re distant. Emotionally unavailable. Ratings getters. Which made those wacky pollsters in Guapberg wonder, who will be the next antihero? Well, that’s this weeks poll.
Answer soon, answer often – but answer by 2359 EST on Wednesday, 12 Feb, because that’s when this one ends. Please don’t go over 3 write-in answers, and if you like, leave an name on your write-ins, and I’ll link back next week.

And before we go back to the daily grind, enjoy this…

Have a great week everyone!