Tag Archives: ponderings

Clutter is Bad for the Head, UPDATED


Today’s Music: Huey Lewis

What a difference a day makes.

And I’m feeling much better myself. Just after that small bit of tidying.
Go figure…

ALSO, Friday Foolishness is almost here. So if you haven’t yet, check out last week’s poll and vote.

And as always, thanks for stopping by!

An Adventure – Learning to Ski


Today’s Music: Tori Amos

So, here we are, in the ongoing series of “Learning to” Adventures posts.

Some of my best skiing days have happened when I was hung over. I don’t recommend that condition for actually learning to ski though.

This picture isn't me, but could have been. Many times.

Skiing (from Urban Dictionary): somethin a person does in the wintertime to convince oneself that he or she is actually enjoying the 10 degree weather.

The first thing is to get the right clothes.
The first time I went, I wore jeans. And fell a lot. All the dye in the denim seeped right through the top 20 layers of my skin, and I had blue legs through February.

Second thing is have a sense of humor.
You’re going to fall. No way around it. If you can laugh about it, you’ll be able to get back up and learn to stay up that much faster, thereby freeing yourself to laugh at the poor bastard behind you who just did a fantastic slow-mo windmilling flop. While not moving.

Third thing is to get a teacher.
By teacher I mean not just someone who knows how to ski, but someone who can teach it.

Let me explain.
So one winter, Ronnie and Meat decided I should learn how to ski. Sure, why not.
We trundled up to the mountain, and I got my rental gear and lift ticket, and we headed up the mountain. To the top.

Much scarier with planks strapped to your feet. And no idea what you're doing.

This was the lesson, as explained to me by Meat: Ronnie’ll go first and show you what to do. I’ll go behind you to pick up your stuff (see top pic) and tell you what you did wrong.

One thing I learned about cold mountain air – it clears hangovers fast. Well, that and terror.

For those of you have never been to Hunter Mountain, the main skiing face faces east. That means it is softened by the morning sun. Which means?
Exactly. When the sun crests and begins to set in the west, the east face freezes back up. Into sheet ice.

People out west mock the east coast snow. And justifiably, because their’s is much softer and fluffier.
But lemme tell you, if you can ski the east (especially someplace like Hunter), you can ski anywhere.

Back to the lesson.

The fourth thing is to Zip. Up. Your. Jacket. All the way.
We’ve already established that you will fall. At some point, you will probably Yard Sale (again, see top pic).
That’s where both your skis come off and shoot in opposite directions, your poles bounce off to God-knows-where, your hat is half buried in the snow behind you, a glove may have come off, and your lungs are twice their normal size from all the snow forced down your throat as you belly surfed down the hill.
Zipping your jacket will keep at least one square yard of snow off your chest.

Having fun yet?

Looks ridiculous, but it does work.

Good. Because it isn’t all horror. By the end of the day, I was able to use my modified snowplow to zig-zag down the mountain in one piece. I was skiing!

Meat and Ronnie gave me my first lessons in skiing parallel too (as opposed to snowplow), and this gave me (barely) enough control and (way too much) speed to be able to zip down the mountain making some truly…unique maneuvers.
I had so much fun, I eventually forgave them for their wtf teaching method.

Once I could ski at a level near theirs, we needed to add some tricks,
like the Daffy, and the Backscratcher

I've done this! And landed well!

I've done this! The landing was hilarious. And painful.

Now, my wife (the most wonderful girl in the universe) and I try and go skiing at least once a year. I taught her the basics, and she very wisely (and relationship savingly) decided to take a real lesson. She gets better every year. And so do I.

Looking back over this, I think the most important part of learning to ski is to do it because it’s fun, and you want to enjoy it.
Otherwise, you’ll end up with blue legs, or a belly full of ice, or a broken rib (that one really sucked, but I skied the rest of the day anyway), and no big stupid grin to show for it.

Bought these after I knew how to use them. They were great, but their time has passed...

Now if you’ll excuse me, I think I’ll go see what lift tickets will be this season, and try on my ski hat…

Yes, I do wear it in public. Sometimes, I even wear it to work.

Friday Foolishness – Jellybean edition


Today’s Music: Kina Grannis

First the old business – results of last weeks’ poll:
Other responses were
1 – not yet a problem
2 – When it grows long enough, I braid it with my nose hair. Looks like a mustache.

I like 2 myself, and may try it when the hair gets uncontrollable…
And the winner is
a tie between “Ear hair? Really? What kind of a freak are you?” and “Au Naturale”.

Thanks to all you voters.

And here’s this weeks’ “What the hell is wrong with him?” poll:

And while you wait for the answers (voting ends next Thursday at midnight), please enjoy a jellybean video from today’s Today’s Music artist.

Have a great weekend, everyone!

Friday Foolishness, and Check. Your. Calendar.


Today’s Music: GWAR
The video is slightly disturbing, the music isn’t bad. Think KISS on a really bad high. Their guitarist passed away last night, so they are Today’s Music as a tribute.

Next, to the old business –
The hands down category winner to last weeks Friday Foolishness poll is Other.
The Written In answers are as follows:

– Are you suggesting that only bloggers should be responding to this poll?
– I ain’t admitting to nuthun.

In reference to the first answer, you know, it didn’t even occur to me to add a non-blogger answer. How silly of me…

And now, on to the new silliness!!! (even though there is rarely anything but silliness around here…)

I was going to go with a rant today, since there was Christmas music playing when I bought my coffee this morning. When I paid, I asked the girl if it was a one-off, but no, apparently that’s all they are playing now. And for the next. 8. weeks.
But I think I’ll save that for a more detailed diatribe, maybe this weekend.

So, in keeping with the theme of Friday Foolishness, another question.
This was going to be part of another entry, but I would like your thoughts on the matter.

And non-bloggers should be able to get in on this one too!
(If you write in an answer, please include contact info if you like)

‘Cause folks, it don’t get no foolisher than that.
Have a good weekend!

Adminisilliness (a Bread Crumbs post)


(*This page is a permanent page above the title bar.
It was suggested that I post it as a regular page, because who ever really reads the fine print anyway…
As such, there is no Today’s Music here. On the other hand, I haven’t finished my ideas for the next post, so think of this as a Bread Crumbs (filler) post.)

I hate paperwork.
Even virtual paperwork.
But every so often, it has to be done.
So here it is:

1 Nov 2011
This blog is maintained/arranged/updated by El Guapo (the handsome one).
(As I keep telling myself).
He can be contacted at Guaposaur@gmail.com

Posts are made irregularly. Mostly because I want to say something worth saying (at least to me), as opposed to just adding to the general cacophony. My Reader(s?) deserve better.

Pictures are added as needed to express a point, clarify a point, or to amuse the author (again, me).

Today’s Music may be what I’m listening to at that moment, or something I feel is appropriate to the post, or an act I want to highlight. Check them out, you might like them. And any musical suggestions are always welcome.

Occasionally there will be a Today’s Adventure. That is a quick note on something I’ve done recently that I really enjoyed.
I hope there will be lots of them.

Comments are allowed instantly, but are checked regularly, since I find myself not wanting to do my job when I am there, so I poke around online instead.
With that in mind, please be respectful. You can be as passionate as you like in expressing your point of view, but please don’t descend to immature name calling.
Or I will summon the Flaming Balls of Zoltan upon thine comments. Sadly for the justice system, I am the court of last resort around here.

I do read all comments, and do my best to respond to/answer questions raised in them. If you’re shy and want to ask me something, feel free to email.

My philosophy is that we should all enjoy the bejeezus out of ourselves up to the point where we infringe upon the ability of others to enjoy themselves.

I enjoy sour and half-sour dill pickles, but not the “bread and butter” ones.

I think that covers it.

Let me know if I left something out.

*This will probably be updated as soon as I remember what I forgot.