Today’s Music: Paramore – Misery Business
Well, those wacky Trifectans have challenged us again. This weekend, they want 33 words written in the first person.
You see where I’m going with this, right?
I stood for the ceremony. My position required my presence there. The lucky winner gave me his name for the form. I filled it out and left.
Because if it wasn’t for S&W, I’d have no idea what first person singular was.
I only wrote-in the first person.
(If it’s of any use to you, I was thinking this was a supermarket opening, though I have no idea why someone would need to be signed in for that…)
Follow the Trifecta link and check out the great entries this week.
Today’s Music: Ray Charles – I Don’t Need No Doctor
Another week, another Trifecta. For this challenge, they want the thirty three to three hundred thirty three words using the third definition of the word “Doctor” (noun) –
a : material added (as to food) to produce a desired effect
b : a blade (as of metal) for spreading a coating or scraping a surface
*Disclaimer – despite my recent finger wound, I was not on painkillers when I wrote this.
But you may want to be when you read it.
The EMTs stood over the frothing man.
He sat in front of a laptop, 72 MS Word documents open.
His eyes were wide.
He was gibbering.
He wasn’t wearing pants.
Yogurt from a tipped cup slowly oozed across the table next to him.
The EMTs looked at each other.
“Have you ever seen anything like this, Hank?” asked the first.
The frothing man shot up, sitting rigidly straight.
“IT’S THE WORST THING EVER, HANK!!!!” he shrieked before slumping back down.
Hank frowned, and picked up the half empty yogurt cup. He took a deep smell. His brow furrowed.
He gingerly dipped the smallest part of his pinky fingernail into the swirly goop, just deeply enough to catch a small bit on the tip. He lifted it up to his lips to taste the digit, his eyes widening as the flavor swirled over his tongue.
“Someone has added something as a doctor of the yogurt, Fred” he declared. “It’s…hyperbole!”
Fred gasped (only partly at the akwardness of the sentence construction).
“But that also means it’s about a week and a half old!” said Fred, remembering the Trifecta challenges schedule.
“Yes” said Frank, authoritatively. “We can’t help him. This man a needs a doctor!”
The man sat straight up again, pulling something shiny from below. He frantically worked it into the spilled yogurt, spreading it over the surface of the table…the laptop…his bellybutton.
Etched in the stainless steel, the words “The Doctor” gleamed in the light.
Hank shook his head. “Or a psychiatrist…”
Fred stepped back. “I do not want to know where he pulled that from.
But I bet it was bigger on the inside…”
(This week’s contest is community judged, so go check out their site, read some of the other great entries and vote for them.)
(It would be a travesty if I won.)
Posted in Babblings, BIG FUN, Trifextra Challenge, Uncategorized
Tagged Doctor, He has no respect for EMTs, I Don't Need No Doctor, I don't think he cares, Just rattles off more weird tales, Ray Charles, Trifextra Challenge, Yogurt
Today’s Music: Marah – Out in Style
The weekend challenge from those most enlightened souls ever at Trifecta is to demonstrate hyperbole in 33 words.
Since it’s all about going over the top, I thought I’d try it not once, not twice, but three, yes, three magically wonderful spectacular times!!!!
(Good lord, now I can’t stop.)
One thing on the last piece – I actually did ask myself that question.
My gesticulating, however, was mild.
I’d Give My Left Arm To Tell Stories Like This…
“If we don’t finish this now, the world will end!” he shouted.
“Whatever”, I answered. “I’m going to sit down and take a break.”
I made it five steps before the planet exploded…
I’d Give My Right Arm To Tell A Story Like This!!!
My grandpa used to tell me incredible stories about how hard it was to complete the trifextra challenges. But he did it.
In the snow.
In the dark.
THIS STORY WAS WRITTEN WITH NO ARMS!!!!!!
“Can it be called hyperbole if you are accurately describing the thing you’re talking about?” he asked, gesticulating wildly.
His friend paused.
“That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.”
Thank you, and please consider this my formal apology for inflicting this on you.
Today’s Music: Berlin – No More Words
Another weekend, another Trifextra challenge. This weekend, it’s pretty straightforward.
For the weekend prompt we’re asking for exactly 33 words of dialogue.
So in true “Guapo can’t take these things seriously” fashion, lets dive right in, shall we?
“Hey, are you going to enter this weeks Trifecta?”
“Thinking about it.”
“So what will you write about?”
“I don’t know, but I have to be concise.”
“Because I only have 33– “
And I thank you.
Check out the Trifecta for all the other entries from some truly talented writers!
Today’s Music: The Hooters – And We Danced
Trifecta has been going for a year! And in their delightully challenging way, they want to know (in 33 words, of course) why we write.
For those of you that haven’t figured me out yet, this should make it perfectly clear.
And again, apologies to Trifecta and all of the ridiculously talented writers who take part in their challenges!
Why I Write (for Trifecta)
I cannot speak for any one else – what drives them, what pushes them, for what they yearn.
I can only speak (or write) for myself.
Because Trifecta doesn’t accept submissions in interpretive dance.
I call this “Abscess of Reality” or “Where’s the Rice?!?”