Tag Archives: English Muffins

Into The Valley Of Foolishness Rode The Six Hundred…


Today’s Music: Cowboy Mouth – Jenny Says

The wheel has gone around and once again landed on Friday! Another successful week in which I kept my opinions of office goings-on mostly to myself, thereby ensuring my continued employment.
And how did I distract myself from the banality? Why. by reading blogs, of course! Here’s some of what I saw…
REDdog told the story of his First Tattoo. Girl Seule wrote about the joys of Crowd Funded Breasts!, and DJ Matticus and co-authors are giving away copies of Fauxpocalypse, so grab a copy of what I hear is a great book!

Oh, and Helena Hann Basquiat bestowed a Liebster Award (because of my crushed velevet smoking jacket), and That’s Ron To You gave me a Versatile Blogger Award. Probably because I type all my posts with my toes. (Yes, I’m that versatile!)
I hope y’all check them both out. They really have great sites!

But before you head over to them, let’s talk about last week’s poll. We asked about English Muffins, and what was going on with those nooks and crannies. From your answers, it’s clear they’re not big enough to contain your cleverness! Here’s what you said. (As always, my comments are toasted in italics.)

Wormholes left by Ancient Astronauts ~ Stephen Hawking (of Reno)
(That’s why the taste is out of this world!)
just air because some nitwit whipped them too much – Benzeknees
(Arthur Muffin the Fourteenth says it’s not so easy to program those machines correctly.)
Crumpets are for the night after the midnight picnic… Not as juicy though… Andro
(And crumbs in bed for the morning after that…)
I always enjoy a bit of crumpet, actually I prefer lots… Andro
(Gee, I prefer strumpets.)
Yes Crumpets that man and remember that okay, rant over… Andro
(So…I’m thinking you mean…crumpets?)
Air. Nothing clever. Just air. (Stacy)
(English Muffins are know for their dry…wit.)
wanna be donut holes –Linda Vernon
(Who knows what dreams lie in the hearts of baked goods? The butter knows!)
A place to stash my diary in which I curse everyone I know-Life Confusions
(bitter anger never tasted so good!)
Sweet lakes of butter, for me to lap up, and they butter up my muffin tops! Dawn @ TFTM
(You’re going to get me re-ranked as an explicit blog.)
Little bread elves take bites out of your muffins while you sleep. Amy R
(So…good drugs then?)
The Catholic Church’s explanation Elyse 54.5
(The Slather, the Bun and the Holy Toast?)
crabby old women who finally discovered e-readers. JakLumen
(WE HAVE A WINNER!!! Seriously, I rarely hit such surreal heights as this.)
We can’t tell you. It is a state secret. Merlinspielen
(In Russia, the English muffins YOU!)
just dyslexic crooks and nannies. – calahan
(Oh for dog’s sake.)
Places to stick your ABC gum. Kayjai
(Younger me is glad it’s no longer stuck in my hair.)
the sexiest part of a woman’s body (SnB)
(A balanced part of a complete breakfast!)
to hold the masses of peanut butter and honey, YUM! – Curvyroads
(I thought jelly was the opiate of the masses?)
addictive little pockets of crack cocaine. thematticuskingdom
(You mean those aren’t deliciously healthy nubs of fiber?!?)
Zoe here…Nooks are the creators cheaping out on a full piece of circle.
(Sounds like the beginning of a great story…arc.)
Zoe here again:Crannies are the filler, to make you think you’re full.
(Filler…like seasons two through five of Lost?)
how should I know? I’m a writer not a scientist! thematticuskingdom
(Michio Kaku says “why not be both?”.)
(And “buy my books”. He says that a lot too. )

a typo. It was supposed to be crooks and nannies. thematticuskingdom
(It was also a typo that left them stranded with a warehouse full of puffins.)
crooks and grannies-inventors of the Eng. muffin. The Sailor’s Woman
(I prefer books and jammies – anchors of the bedtime routine.)
PMAO. We call them ‘freedom muffins’.
(the only meaningful contribution of Congress to society in the last twenty years.)
I’m not sure, but he can spread butter on my toast any day! Susie Lindau
(Umm…what kind of muffins are we talking about here?)
The cellulite in my thighs. brickhousechick
(I can’t believe it’s not butter!)
places to hide more alcohol! Twindaddy
(I like to leave the alcohol out in the open. On muffin coasters.)
peanut butter holders – Rutabaga
(Just like that automatic tray on my computer!)

Congratulations to JakLumen for this weeks winning answer!!!, proving once again that polls are stranger than fiction. And from the offered choices, the most popular was They’re called “crumpets”, you bloody Yank!. So congratulations to all you English xenophobes out there too!
Clutter
This week, My girl and I have been closing up an estate. There was a ton of packing and sorting and arranging before donating it to a variety of charities that will hopefully hand the stuff off to people who could use it.
It got me to thinking about all the stuff I have and, of course, all the stuff you have. So This weeks question is what do you do with it all??? Let us know as often as you like, but let us know by Tuesday, 1 April, 2359 EDT, because that’s when this one ends.
Try and keep yourself to three Other answers if you do write-ins, and if you do leave an Other, add a way to recognize you at the end, and I’ll link back to you next week.

And til next time, enjoy a quick behind the scenes view of every sitcom casting session ever,

Have a great weekend, everyone!

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When life gives you lemons, make Foolishness!(ade.)


Today’s Music: Beebs and her Money Makers – Hand Out

And if you can, please help out Merbear.===========================>>>

Is there a spring in your step? Did you spring out of bed today? did you remember to flip the mattress? All this and more is on my mind this week, because spring has sprung! But what’s the “and more”? Why, the blogs I’ve read. Here’s some of what I saw… Wholey Jean had some great tips for being a role model to your inner child. Not A Punk Rocker wrote about how some Suicides Are Viewed, and Sean Smithson posted gratuitous selfies to promote his Book (with possibly the funniest dickhead pic ever).

Thank you all, and everyone else for the thoughtful and entertaining posts this week!

And thanks so much to The Sailor’s Woman for bestowing a Liebster Award on me! (Though her chihuahua may have made her do it.)
I hope you all take a minute to check out her great site!

When will it end? WHEN???

When will it end? WHEN???


Last week, we celebrated what we hoped was the last hurrah of winter by asking what you’ll miss most about it.
Based on your comments, I don’t think many of you wanted to make winter feel welcome. Here’s what you said. (As always, my comments are slowly thawing in italics.)

When it snows, I have something to blame all the white powder on – Revis
(Blame it on the dog! That cokehead..)
Reading this before adding something stupid… Andro
(I read these every week. Never stops me…)
Not freezing my rocks off… Andro
(But it would be rude to freeze someone elses off!)

(I thought y’all just put snow chains on your moose.)
Absofrickinlutely nothing John Phillips
(You sound a little unsure…)
Making fun of Americans John Phillips
(I’m sure we’ll do something mockable soon.)
Having to finally leave Phucket and go back to the States that are United~~Addie
(I thought we were still split over that whole “Team Edward/Team Jacob” thing?)
snow days SnB
(I thought Canada just had snow “months”?)
Living under the SnowDome
(I prefer the SnowGlobe. Except when people shake it.)
The Polar Vortex. I love a good vortex. (Miz Yank)
(Can I interest you in my vortex of debt?)
Those whiny bastages in New York and Jersey. Pull up your big-girl longjohns! ~Miss R
(Umm…what’s the male version of “camel-toe”?)
Watching my husband do all the work! Elyse 54.5
(Just get him a lawnmower!)
Matching sweaters for me and my Chihuahua. The Sailors Woman
(As your chihuahua breathes a palpable sigh of relief…)
maybe I’ll miss snow. I’m crazy like that. JakLumen
(I think if you sit back and weigh the pros and cons, you’ll find that you won’t really miss it.)
I won’t miss it. It hurt. Literally. JakLumen
(TOLD YA!)
Everything! (Seriously, everything.) Stacy
(WE HAVE A WINNER!!! For a totally…unique…view of winter.)
Winter I hardly knew ye –Linda “California” Vernon
(It was the season where you lounged while we wept. Good times!)
the way it spooned with me at night. – calahan
(Isn’t a shovel more effective?)
PMAO…I am going to miss doing posts of flowers and sunsets in San Diego that I do solely to drive people who live where it snows crazy.
(I’m going to miss the radiant smog in those pictures…)
getting to be jealous of everyone else’s winter. thematticuskingdom
(Trust me, we’re happy to share.)
the early sunsets. thematticuskingdom
(Nothing more romantic than a moonlit lunch.)
the Christmas cheer. thematticuskingdom
(Only 278 shopping days to go…)
brickhousechick: Eating 300 Oreos during Natl’ Oreo Day 3/6
(This is Madness. NO! THIS IS OREOOOOOSSSS!!!!)
Skiing and my fleece workout pants. Susie Lindau
(Water skiing in fleece shorts!)
Hot toddies.
(cold beer.)
The temp outside matching the temp of my heart. – Twindaddy
(Now your heart will just have to be a seething cauldron of rage.)
The agony of another NO SNOW winter – Rutabaga
(Oh. The horror.)
having an excuse not to take a bath for weeks ! Life ConfusionsLife Confusions
(Once they turn on the fountains in the park, I have no excuse.)
How can I miss it when it’s never going to f*&#ing end?? polysyllabic profundities
(This would have won, but I don’t want to encourage winter.)
complaining about it on my blog – The Waiting
(Wait – does that mean more raisin/poop stories? BRING BACK THE SNOW!!!)
The sound of my frozen testicles banging against each other (Trent Lewin)
(As long as you don’t look for other things to bang them against…)

Congratulations to Stacy for this weeks winning answer! And from the offered choices, the most popular was Watching the door hit its ass on its way out. So congratulations to all you violent portal users out there! (A close second was being made fun of by Canada, so I think some people need to work on their politeness. I’m looking at you, British Columbia.)

I bet he could melt some butter. But I don't want to know about his nooks or crannies.

I bet he could melt some butter.
But I don’t want to know about his nooks or crannies.


This week, I’m intrigued by breakfast food. The bread in fact. English muffins, to be precise. (It’s the foolishness. It’s not supposed to make sense.) I’d like to know what you think those nooks and crannies are, so that’s what I’m asking. Offer as many scrumptious thoughts as you like, but offer them by Tuesday, 25 March at 2359 EDT, because that’s when this one ends.
Try and keep yourself to three Other answers if you do write-ins, and if you do leave an Other, add a way to recognize you at the end, and I’ll link back to you next week.

And so, until the foolishness brings us together again, please enjoy The Great Flydini.

Have a great week everyone!