Today’s Music: Willie Nelson – On The Road Again
Those of you that have been around some of the blogs on my blogroll have already heard of H.E. Ellis first book, Gods of Asphalt, Book 1 (or availablehere)
There have been several reviews around the net, all of them good (as they should be). There have been many accolades from other bloggers to H.E. (as there should be).
However, in all my Googling, I have not found a single limerick tribute.
That’s just wrong folks. Or rather, the limerick I am about to present is just wrong.
Those of you who have read the book can see how this fits. Those of you who haven’t should go read the book, then come back and read the limerick (cause I want the site hits). (And the book is pretty damn good.)
Just so you know, H.E. knew nothing about the posting of the limerick. If she had
– It would have been much better
– I would be in traction from massive damage from her running me over in her Jeep. Even though I’m on the 16th floor here.
And so, with no further apologies (since I really can’t make enough of them for this travesty), the Gods of Asphalt limerick:
Playing ball was Sawyers dream in this world
Confronted his dad in a big ugly whirl.
At Gus’ place he learned
How the road twisted and turned.
Drove off with dad to serenade the girl
Really, I don;t know how you people read these limericks. I think I hit a new low. In the head. With a brick.
Sigh.
Anyway, go check out the book. It will do wonders towwards cleaning out the bad taste in your brain from this.
You’re welcome.
If it gets more readers to take a look
At Ms. Ellis’ fantastic book
Your limerick
Will do the trick
By giving them the link that they need to click
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YOU’RE HIRED!!!
Because if I keep limericking the way I’ve been, I’m sure there will be a knock on my door one late night…
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I’ve put it on my list. Is it anything like “American Gods” by Neil Gaiman? Because that book was awesome!
The Chicago Public Library system apparently has not yet been enlightened by this book. Is it brand new?
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Funny that you should have Neil Gaiman and Chicago Public Library in your comment. I remember a kerfluffle with them (this summer maybe) when one of his books was chosen as a featured summer reading book, and some lawmakers objected.
There isn’t anything supernatural/fantastical about Gods of Asphalt. It’s a novel about a teenager growing as a person, set in Nebraska. To be honest, I found the first few chapters really annoying, until I realized that was because the character could have been me or any of my friends at that age and it was written so well that it really did remind me of me at my worst.
Overall, I loved the story, and there were touches in the book on par with any famous author.
If you go with the e-book for .99, you are getting way more than your money’s worth. I’m probably going to grab a hardcopy or two as gifts.
And I love Neil Gaiman. I recently re-read Neverwhere for the 3rd time. Also, his Doctor Who episode from the last series was one of the best episodes they’ve done.
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You have been truly blessed by the Gods of Creativity, my friend! Well done!
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Thank you! But if you keep encouraging this sort of thing, you will have only yourself to blame for the next installment.
Though I may set up a side store for brain bleach for those who need it after reading…
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Even though I’m a writer, I can’t seem to craft a comment worthy of how totally frigging awesome this limerick is. Seriously dude, you made me dip into my “Jeb” word bank. Awesomesauce.
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Reward enough!
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How Cool!
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Why thank you!
I did enjoy the book a lot though.
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Guapo, you just keep on Limericking and let us decide what’s a travesty.
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Thanks Brian. I only fear that in the wrong hands, these limericks could traumatize unwary visitors.
though I’m not sure whose are the right hands!
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Can’t improve on that.
There once was a woman named Hellis
Who got along well with the fellis
Then she wrote a book
We all took a look
Now the Gods of Writing are jellis.
Nope. That suck-diddly-ucked.
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GAH!!! My eyes!!!
I’m also betting you just rolled that out as opposed to spending your whole morning commute trying to find the right word that would fit end rhyme.
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Suck? No. Awesomesauce? Yes!!!!! I think you need to trademark that word. I swear, you’d be rich on royalties right now.
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Careful – Wil Wheaton uses that word too, and I hear he fights dirty. Saw the guy on a talk show the other day, and he just whipped out a 12 sided die. BAM.
Host never knew what hit him…
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Hi,
Not bad at all, and now it seems I will have to read of the book, it does sound interesting, and of course link back here to reread the limerick. 😀
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Thanks, magsx2. Now that you’ve read the limerick, it’s quite possible that the only way to save your brain is to read the book too…
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Should I even LIKE or COMMENT given that I haven’t read the book 😦
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You can always read it and come back. It was good, actually finished reading the e book on my monitor at work because I needed to know how it ended.
And the fact that you can Like or Comment after that limerick gives me hope for your mental constitution!
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Nothing wrong with a good limerick. In some societies, it was considered the highest form of art. Those societies have now failed, but I don’t think that’s a reason to disregard it completely. America needs a good limerick right now. Thank you, soldier.
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Well said, edrevets. You have eloquently summed up the thesis of Jared Diamond’s Guns, Germs and Limericks – The Fates of Societies.
Perhaps you’ll make some sort of rhyming couplet construction about it?
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Wow, didn’t mean to put the buy link there.
But it was a fascinating (if a bit dry) book.
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well I can see you’re either a huge fan of the book or an underground marketer.
I did try to read it once, but something happened after the first chapter and I never finished it. It’s still around here somewhere…..
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I’m still amazed that I get into stuff like that. Started his other one – Collapse, just couldn’t get into it. Should try again…
Got any good Civil War history?
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I only know of Gods and Generals… I read it a while ago and I think it made me tear up. War can be sad sometimes.
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Check out The Last Full Measure by the father, Jeff Shaara. His son wrote Gods and Generals, and the third (don’t recall the title). It was a fascinating, moving and wrenching story, almost completely dead on in its historical accuracy.
It’s the best of the three and the first Civil War stuff I read. It pushed me down a fascinating path.
Aannddd now I’ve hijacked my own blog entry.
Sigh…
And read Gods of Asphalt!
(there, back on track)
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Hey … .I have a book of all limericks, which actually has 13 versions of a girl from Nantucket.
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Hah! The Nantucket limerick is the one I try to match all my limerick rhythms against.
Thanks for coming by, aFrankAngle!
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I LIKED because I am sure if I read the book it would make perfect sense – also because I like that you limericked – a favorite of my grandfather cept he mostly liked the dirty ones…like the man from nantucket? I won’t deface your blog with it. Thought about it 😛 jk – yea….ummm you ROCK the limerickness of awesomeness.
Is there anything you won’t do?
😉
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Thanks Lizzie. the only things I wouldn’t do are the ones where the jail time isn’t worth the story.
Though I guess at this point it should be the ones where my wife’s (the most wonderful girl in the universe) disapproval is greater than the the story.
Fortunately(?), she likes puns, so i can do limericks.
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As an ex-poet, I have to say I’ve never written a limerick. But I can certainly appreciate reading one. And if this book inspires such a thing, I might just take a peek.
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You should take a shot at it!
EB’s beauty didn’t go to her head.
She was friendly and warm instead
But when she hung out with dad
things turned slightly bad
And mom had to replace yet another poor shed
Thank you, I’ll be appearing all week! Try the veal!
And the book is way better than the babblings here!
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El Guapo, you have just stumbled upon the cleverest book marketing ploy since Gutenburg started fooling around with ink!! Of course, I simply must check out the book out now. I am completely under your limerick spell! 🙂
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Bwahaha – my evil plan is proceeding exactly as I have foreseen!
I’ve got a few others under the Limerick tag, but I think this one is the best.
It’s also the only one where I actually put any effort in.
(Just mentioning that in case it didn’t show – really, it’s still pretty horrrendous!)
Thanks Linda!
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there’s the first mistake – the cover already looks like the cover after the movie of the book has come out!
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Looking at it, the cover is actually a great visual description of the book.
Wonder how they would adapt a limerick for a movie….maybe as a short before the film?
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Ooohhh! Maybe Pixar could make something based on your limerick! Your limerick here, not your OTHER limerick. Yeah, that would be bad.
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Wait a minute – Disney had Touchstone pictures for adult films (I mean grown-up, not “adult”)(it’s still Disney for crying out loud!) Maybe we could option the above and “other” limericks as a package deal!
And they can get Harvey Keitel to do one of the voices!
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Adult Toy Story?
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HORN-E? Finding Ratatouille Up Nemo? Incredible Adult Toy Stories In Cars?
Okay, done.
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Well done. You ran out 5 in the time it took me to look up their films.
I was going to go with “Against The Wall-E”
Clearly, you have bested me sir!
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Yeah. I got nothing.
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That’s not true. You’ve got something.
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I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. You’re the best, Hotspur.
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Second best, maybe..
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Don’t step in number two!!!
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Alas, haven’t read the book – but loved the limerick 🙂
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Thanks, Words!
The book really is a good read – worth checking out!
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1. I will now read this book. 2. I now have a song stuck in my head…. “God of Asphalt” to the tune of “Rock the Casbah.” Grumble.
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Buy, read, you’ll like it
Gods of Asphalt, Gods of Asphalt
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…The crowd caught a whiff
of that crazy Asphalt jive…
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I’m so so sorry. Watch out for Brian – he’s infecting people with earworms too.
And the book should crowd out the Clash. Each chapter has a musical heading.
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Well your limerick tribute left me just having to check out the book and some reviews of it! It does look interesting, I have to admit.
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It was a fun engaging read. When I was done, I was sorry I’d finished it…
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